Napoleon Dynamite Travels The World ! ! !

Invite Him To Visit You!

Well, November No Trades I suppose. But The Game Is Still On.

Seriously folks, what a better way to get a unique and original Christmas present than trading for it on Five Red Dice. Why traipse through Best Buy or storm the doors at Wal-Mart for mass market crap when you can own an original piece of highly collectible art? Please take a moment to look around and make an offer of something suitable, let's get this little train wreck of a site nack on track. Am I gonna have to get up and come over there? Offer! ! !

Five Red Dice Is Back Post-Ike And Ready To Trade!

Well, hello, and Sorry.
Wow, it's been a bit of a six week period here in South Texas. No excuses but about 6 weeks ago, the same weekend family was visiting, Hurricane Gustave stranded family members at my house, the same family who had suffered through Katrina several short years ago.
Two weeks later Mean Old Ike tore through. The eye passed right over us, no great feat being about 40 miles wide. The storm put the electricity out for a solid 2 weeks here, but no damage to my place, though a family member had $60,000 worth of tree damage!!!
Follow this up with a little lethargy and see why I have not been on, but just relax, Five Red Dice is alive and well and seeking trade offers and WILL be trading sweet, skinny Pamela away!
Look for updates and lots of Craigslist ads and promotional stuff.
No Cash, sorry!
In the meantime check out weird stuff at The Odd Report and my image posts on Robot Nine. Interesting little diversions, subscribe by e-mail and get the posts automatically, daily.
Alan

NEW Five Red Dice Business Cards... I Mean Limited Edition, Signed And Numbered Art Prints.

Hello everybody, sorry for the long delay in posting, it's been a busy time for me here in the Deep South, and this is a diversion, a hobby, not a livelihood. I have had friends ask if the project was over, and no, it most assuredly is not. I am still seeking a trade for that sexy, bony woman, Pamela.

I have been working on a few other blogs that are pastimes and that has eaten into my time a bit. There are links on the side if you are interested- Robot Nine is a daily image post, very eclectic, and The Odd Report is a collection of odd news, information, links, images, what have you. Fun. Consider submitting art, photography, or any images to Robot Nine, or join the "What's In You Wallet" project. Enough about that though.

The new Five Red Dice promotional cards are here, and available FREE to all of you. They are great collectibles, and to hand out to friends who say "What is that guy doing again"?

Yes I know, the shakiest photo ever. And the camera has automatic digital image stabilization. Darn the vodka! Beautiful cards though, rich verdant green and translucent red on the dice. Nice!

Of course, they can be signed and numbered, making them instant collectibles, to me anyway.

For those of you uninterested in the simple card, I have figured many other uses for these works of art, and listed them for you below, so as to relieve you of any thinking.

Use a stack of cards to build a 'house of cards'.

Limited edition prints make excellent bookmarks.

Make a Five Red Dice refrigerator magnet for that art your nephew makes, you know, the one who draws less puppies and Mom pictures and more murder victims every year

How about a tiny dust pan for tiny messes, like Chihuahua hair.

Smaller size artists can carry it around and tell people it is there portfolio. The bright colors and fancy word will make the artist less of a Grinch.

A shoe horn. Remember those? Seems we used to use shoe horns to make well-made, cheap shoes last. Now we don't use them on badly made, expensive shoes. Get a Five Red Dice shoe horn and save your shoes.

Stacks of them are great to level tables and chairs. You should never go out to eat without a handy supply of Five Red Dice table and chair levelers.

These durable cards will scrape ice from a freezer. Probably great for icy windshields and bathroom grime also.

Put a card behind the sofa in a doll house and you have a stunning piece of modern art. A sure-fire decoration to amaze all the ladies at the monthly Doll House Club meetings.

Of course the best use, and the easiest, might be to just hand a few out to friends and tell them "Go, make an offer, NOW!"

Alan Mizell

P.S. Leslie- your cards of both types are on the way, thanks for the self addressed and atmped envelope!

More Art, Art, Art! I Love Art. I Want A Bicycle Built For Two!

Kirsten Baldwin of Houston has e-mailed in an offer for some artwork. I will let her tell you more about it, but everyone including Kirsten knows I want to take the project in a different direction than art- unless you have Leonardo's secret second Mona Lisa or something! You can tell by a quick examination that this particular piece of art is "EXCELLENT".

Excellent Art

In Kirstens words...

"Good Morning.
I stumbled upon your website on Craigslist (I am a Craigslist junkie). Very interesting. So I thought I would join in the fun. I am offering for trade - although I see from your comments that you do not necessarliy want art for art, I'm giving it a shot anyway - an original piece from 1970 - crayola and pencil on Manila paper - titled: "Excellent". I believe this particular piece was finished in Houston at the "Little Red School House" in Westbury Square, most probably in Mrs. Triebus' kindergarten class. I'm sure it's worth millions. I'm sure it's at least worth Park Place or Boardwalk, or the green ones.
Thank you for your consideration, Kirstin"

That's really cool, but a different direction I must go. Besides, taking someones irreplaceable childhood art seems a little... sad. Unless it's a clever forgery. Kirsten? In the meantime check out Kirsten's artwork at her website BaldwinInk.com

Offer To Trade For Half A Bottle Of Worcestershire Sauce. Hmmm. Let Me Think On That One.

Marcia of Whiteness, Shetland Isles, U.K., which is a LONG way from Houston, Texas sent in the following offer. I let Martha tell you herself...

"less than half of a used 150ml bottle of Lea & PerrinsWorcestershire Sauce (for the non brits its pronounced 'wustershire',thought i'd best mention that in case you try and say it and make a fool ofyourself!! it is delicious on cheese and toast and i always shake it on my bakedbeans..yum!"

Hmmm, used sauce?

The Sauce In Question

Maybe I would have considered the trade Marcia but I had just walked in from the market with four bottles of sauce myself! And that should last about 30-40 years around here.

Sorry the posts have been a little out of whack, not very frequent. Family is coming to town and therefore the house required the 'Spring Cleaning' that we missed the last two springs! Hey, don't judge me. The Five Red Dice project is still totally in gear, accepting trades and looking for members, ideas, comments, whatever. So keep telling friends and somebody will make an offer I can accept.

Something other than 'used sauce'!

We have had several new countries check us out including such unlikely spots as Iran and Uganda. That's pretty cool. You can see who visits by clicking on the Feedjit link in the sidebar and the SiteMeter link at the bottom of the page. It's pretty interesting to watch when things are rolling.

Well, off to scrub a bit more.

Alan Mizell

Houston, TX

Several New Offers, Old Questions, And A Fascinating Blog To Read

Charles McCarthy of Atlanta, GA offered another of his fascinating art pieces for Pamela. I surely would consider a trade for his art as I like it but I really do not want to trade for more art. I am afraid that the Five Red Dice project would begin to be pigeon-holed as an 'ART' trading project, rather than just trading. Some folks have had a bit of trouble in the past, thinking it was just art that could be offered.
Very unique, and a bit bizarre, this art is right up my alley. The piece below is also by Charles, and I looked for quite a while before I saw the woman had the head of a bird. Or does she? Charles also runs a great blog called 'Ideas by Chuck', and I highly recommend you read it. It's kind of a forum for his ideas for new products, businesses, etc. I liken it to an online bull session or one man think tank. I subscribed so when he posts a new idea I get it in the email.

Another offer to come in this week was for one of those rocks painted like an animal, similar to the cat below. She did not supply a photo which makes it hard to consider, but I am always interested. Was it a cat? I hope so because it rests in her rocking chair she revealed. Cool, my perfect pet; zero maintenance. Send a pic Ma'am, maybe it's my dream pet rock!

In the biggest Five Red Dice mystery category would be the "Mystery" bag offered by Denise in Sterling Heights, Michigan. She promised future clues and my inability to resist trading for this fabulous mystery. Then she went on vacation promising me and the readers future clues, yet none have come in and my emails go unanswered. Must have been one heck of a vacation romance she had or something.

Sterling Heights, MI shows up a lot on the feed, so I am wondering if Denise sees this. Out with some more clues girl!!!

Also Mr. Mesa, Arizona has failed to deliver details or photos on the GIANT chess board that intrigued me, so I have to officially pass as enthusiasm for the project is one component of the decision making project.

Remember, if you want to see all of the offers that have come in for Pamela go to All Offers For Pamela and check them out. There's quite a few, but don't let that make you not trade as your offer could be the one that makes me say YES!

Alan Mizell

Houston, Texas USA